Humanity has reached a point where, as dawn breaks, the ordinary mind wakes with a mind fashioned to consume content. The ordinary man goes about daily activities with a preconditioned mind that has lost the essence of time and sees no beyond immediate gratification. We go about with ego-consumed hearts, glad to have been born at a time when there is only the similitude of success and progress all around us. We all believe there may not be a more exciting time on earth.

Perhaps, it is a controversial assertion regarding the workings of humans and our minds. But in the metaphorical sense, if we are mindful of our every action, it might give this tale of a fraction-swamped generation a good ending.

The curious minds start to ponder the concepts of Quixotic Ideal, Defense Mechanisms, and how Social Media fits into the picture. These are best understood if the mind takes a stroll and there is a conscious appraisal of the unfolding of events that relegate our minds into the abyss of mental instability. In trying to juxtapose what has been done right and wrong, we get thrown into an impassable realm of insanity. Minds have suffered for quite some time, with no one seeming to realize the harsh game being played on us.

With a history that dates back to 1605, quixotic ideal, or, more originally said, quixotism, sets the human mind on a utopian journey. The quixotic mind exists with an unrelenting fervour to seek ideals born by impulsive, snooty, and dreamy ideas. It means holding on to ideals and disregarding practicality by refusing to take consequences or absurdity seriously.

Quixotism finds its root in “Don Quixote”, a great Spanish epic novel whose title character was a man of extreme idealism. An idealism that did not take into account the absurdity or the unrealistic outlines of the conceived archetype. It can also be regarded as the impulsiveness or impracticality of a person in the pursuit of ideals.

It can be inferred from the works of Spanish Nobel laureate Santiago y Cajal that the quixotic is not a madman but a gentleman with solid ideals who consciously render loyalty to their convictions and elaborate ideals, ideals of humanity, magnificence, and justice. Instead of signs of illness, those values must always have roots in true science¹.

It could be argued that quixotism may be an amazing sense of intellect because it rejects ordinary reasoning based on observable knowledge and sound logic in favour of curiosity and abstract thought. In that view, quixotism can be portrayed in two closely related views:  the positive (ambitious ideals) and the negative (unrealistic ideals). But it is key to keep in mind that there is a thin line between these two.

As saddening as it may be, the negative form of quixotism is ravaging our society today in the form of a defence mechanism sired by social media.

This talk of defence mechanisms leads us to the world of psychoanalysis, where we learn that they are psychologically induced frameworks that reduce anxiety based on stimuli. These mechanisms mostly arise from incentives that are usually unacceptable and potentially harmful. Like a double-edged sword, there are two sides to defence mechanisms. They may result in either healthy or unhealthy consequences that depend on the circumstances surrounding (or, say, environments wherein) and the frequency at which these mechanisms are deployed².

Defence mechanisms are essentially psychological strategies brought unconsciously into play to either manipulate, deny or distort reality to defend against feelings of anxiety. Quixotism could well mean fantasy and is categorized in level 2 of a 4-level classification of defence mechanisms. Fantasy is classified in level 2, under what is known as Immature Defences, alongside projection, passive aggression, and acting out - falling into this level could be very toxic³. 

Fantasy can be seen as an illusion or imagination unrestricted by reality. It makes the mind go in circles (mental stress), all in a bid to keep analyzing the impossible³. Challenges of our day-to-day life push us to fantasize, wanting to escape the realities of life that bombard us. And fantasizing will most likely lead an individual to lose touch with reality.

It is interesting to note that immature defences lessen the anxiety produced by people we feel threatened by or uncomfortable realities. When used excessively, immature defences turn persons into socially undesirable fellows who often act immaturely, are challenging to deal with, and are seriously out of touch with reality.

There exists a paradox when talking about social media. The human mind is simultaneously more aware of the world, whatever is in it, and how to take full advantage of it. But at the same time, we suffer from multiple negatives sired by social media, one being Quixotic Ideal.

There is little chance of talking about quixotism and social media without talking about the people it affects most, the Millennials and Gen-Z. Millennials are said to be a generation born after the mid-1980s until the late 1990s, while Gen-Zs are born from the late 1990s to the early 2010s.

It is often said that millennials have specific characteristics that are not praiseworthy, and whether we agree with the assertions or not, there may be interesting lessons to learn from such criticisms. One of the criticisms claims that millennials perplex minds as they seemingly seek purpose and want to make an impact but still seek value for free. It is further pointed out that millennials still find happiness elusive after having all their ideals fulfilled. Many reasons could give credence to this assertion. Among these reasons is technology in the form of smartphones and social media and our use of it. Another popular claim is that millennials can be very impatient⁴.

Connecting the dots between the concepts of quixotism, the psychology behind defence mechanisms, the paradox of social media, and the millennial generation may be ambiguous if examples and expatiations that will lay bare how these concepts form a muddle that menaces minds aren’t given.

It is important to note that social media is not always the cause of the activities that build up to the deployment of fantasy as a defence mechanism. Often, day-to-day events are responsible for anxiety and depression, and we only turn to social media for that defence mechanism.

Take a moment to ponder. While we were growing up, we were fed continuously with adulations and reminders of how special we were. We were told how important we seemingly are to the world. In what I regard as the “Lofty Lie of Childhood,” they told us we could be anything we wanted. These create a beautiful picture in our heads of how perfect and happy our lives should be; after all, we are important to the world and could be whatever we want². I still struggle to understand why we were told we could be whatever we wanted. Tom Bilyeu would argue:

We cannot make a pig into a horse; we can only make a really fast pig.

The effect of these is that; as we progress through adolescence, teenagerhood, and adulthood, there is an increase in how anxious we tend to become as we are constantly reminded that we are not as special as we were told. We then realize that we only become special through grit and hard work³. I wrote in one of my poems,

Stars shine only after burning. Stars twinkling after smouldering…

It is usually late when we find that most of us have not become astronauts, musicians, or whatever grand professional we dreamt of becoming. I believe that in understanding that we must work hard to become relevant to the world, we also realize we must discover what nature intended us to become. This realization leads to shattered self-images for fragile minds, resulting in lower self-esteem.

Now comes the defence. Our ability to show off perfect lives on social media regardless of our inner turmoil means we have an ideal way of escaping real life and its troubles. On social media, we all look our best; we look like we have the perfect lives and have everything figured out when in reality, we do not. This means that we have effectively deployed a defence mechanism, even though we may not have known that we have.

The trend continues, and we become increasingly addicted to our fantasy lives on social media, where we are all charming princes and beautiful damsels. The effect is that we, at some point, become so helpless, and we find it impossible to control the fantasy life, the defence. Do you know that social media generously fills our bodies with dopamine? Yes, that same chemical compound that makes intoxicants and cigarettes so addictive. Now, I guess you know why we have social media addicts.

Dopamine (a major body hormone) is a catecholamine that acts with an inotropic effect on the heart muscle, increasing blood pressure. Functioning as a neurotransmitter in the brain and is associated with the reward system. It plays a significant role in driving behaviours related to pleasurable goals (satisfying one’s hunger, sexual activities, social interactions, and others)^[5][6][7]. Experts have argued that social media, with its addictive quality, activates the dopamine cycle like nicotine and alcohol. These cause a quicker and more intense rush of dopamine that is more than ordinarily needed.

Soon, individuals are left wanting more of the same power rush as the brain acts to lower dopamine levels. Thus, the addiction cycle begins. Low dopamine levels in addicts lead to a lack of motivation, anxiety, mood swings, low self-esteem, and suicidal thoughts. Quitting an addiction has been proven to be very challenging. It sometimes results in depression, psychosis, schizophrenia, Parkinson’s disease, and obesity, but it can be done with help and supervision.

Our inability to communicate effectively with friends and families on a physical level also plays a crucial role in fantasy social media life. When we feel lonely and need to have conversations, we default, go on social media, reeling out messages to multiple persons, searching for a positive response³. What is more sinister is that we feel the impulsive need to do things, whether good or bad, that would garner attention online. What matters to us more are the likes and comments we would get. What this does is that it creates another world for us where we don’t have to smile if we do not want to, a world void of emotions. It creates a world where some only need to show some skin to get likes, and others only need to say something polarizing to gain relevance. In this world, all and sundry think we are doing just well when in reality, we are not⁴.

I don’t know who did, but it is said that:

The most important things are not in what a person says. The most important things are in how a person says what he says. The pauses, the inflexes, they convey the true message.

Due to not having someone to open up to, most people see social media as an alternative, displaying lives that do not belong to them. As said earlier, dopamine plays a huge role in the addiction of such individuals to this kind of social life. They see it as an alternative way of expressing their thoughts, making them fearless and daring.

When individuals get lost in their illusion, the way back is often narrow.

The perfect virtual world social media affords us is undoubtedly unhealthy and should be checked. True, social media is unavoidable due to its numerous benefits and indeed so. However, the failure to keep it under check will, in the long run, lead to many difficulties, some of which are already being experienced.

Nowadays, it is tough for us to form deep and meaningful relationships, meaning that when we face stress, we usually seek comfort from devices that only offer temporary relief. After a while, though, these devices cease to offer the comfort we seek as we fail to keep up with the online pack. Slowly, we become depressed.

The facts are straight, and it is no news that depression is arguably the leading cause of suicide worldwide. Persons who spend more time on Social Media suffer more from depression. Social Media addiction is relatively new to this part of the world, as persons who suffer from it do not even know they do. Little wonder why we have parents who have outsourced parenting to school teachers and religious institutions and hardly know their kids and kids who barely have any real friends. Social Media posts have become the default measuring tool for happiness and success. If not checked, it will lead to the collapse of immediate societies, starting with families. 

This essay has been co-authored by Zainab Olawoye, a student of Nursing from Ladoke Akintola University of Technology.

References
1. Ramón y Cajal, S. (2016). The Psychology of Don Quixote: and the Quixotic Ideal (3rd ed.). CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform.

2. Defence mechanism. (2022, December 26). In Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defence_mechanism

3. Vaillant, G. E., Bond, M., & Vaillant, C. O. (1986). An empirically validated hierarchy of defence mechanisms. Archives of General Psychiatry, 73, 786–794. George Eman Valillant

4. A playlist of Simon Sinek videos on YouTube

5. Dopamine. (2023, March 13). In Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dopamine

6. Dopamine: What It Is, Function & Symptoms (clevelandclinic.org)

7. Deborah Halber: Motivation: Why You Do the Things You Do (brainfacts.org)